[ Wow, this is exactly like the situations in fanfics where people reveal they're in love with other people....
...that Gorgug doesn't read, so it means nothing to Gorgug. Except he's thinking about what Fabian's saying, as he does. Because he just said he wouldn't get jealous, but with Fabian saying there's nothing to get jealous of... is that true? Could he get jealous?
Maybe. But he also isn't sure if it's worth saying that, so. It's a distracting thought for a moment. ]
I can sleep with other people too, then?
[ There isn't a good reason that he asks it. Truthfully, it's just because Fabian's being so flustered and panicking over it that Gorgug asks something that....just comes first to his head. Fabian is saying a thing, so he is going to ask a question based on that thing.
[ Fabian being flustered doesn't help with that question. Because he's just worked up enough that for a moment he imagines Gorgug saying sleep with other people in an entirely different way than the other obviously means - the way Fabian was vehemently denying only a moment ago.
He quickly banishes the thought from his head, considering it's giving him a really weird feeling down in his stomach that he doesn't want to think about enough to find out what it is. ]
W-Well, I mean.. [ Look at Fabian go. He looks so uncertain. Not because he wants to be unfair about this, though - it's more just that he's still flustered. He needs a moment to breathe, to calm down.
Then he can answer Gorgug properly. ]
Of course. Just as friends. I wouldn't find it weird if you slept with Fig the way I do with the Ball. [ See, that feels like a more proper analogy. Bad Kid sleeping. Sleeping with your bestie. T-That's fine, right? Fabian doesn't feel weird about that thought, unlike where his flustered mine went only a moment ago. ]
[ Gorgug understands what Fabian's saying. And yet, there's a moment, and maybe it's delayed to hit him now, but he wonders--was there something else going on between Fabian and the Ball? Because Fabian got worked up when he mentioned the Ball (wait, brain--Riz. Riz), but he's also okay with Gorgug sleeping together with Fig as friends.
...
His mouth opens, and then closes, his brain doing the calculations that are obviously already there. Fabian said he's the first guy he's thought about sexually, and he's willing to believe that, so- no. Fabian and Riz haven't secretly been fucking this entire time. ]
Okay. Yeah. That's what I mean. I don't really sleep with anyone except you and Riz anyway...
[ So, it's not as much of a factor for him, and his sleeping sessions with Riz don't come up as often as they do for Fabian and Riz, so.
...but his brain is still questioning that fluster that Fabian got in, though Gorgug isn't sure how to address it. So what he does, as if it might help anything, is leans in to give Fabian a quick peck on the lips.
Reboot? Reboot. ]
I don't think anything is going on between you and Riz. [ Is he reassuring Fabian? May...be... ] But we should... depending on what we wanna do, we have to remember he's a part of our life here, too. I don't want him to feel lonely.
[ And saying that, it softens Gorgug's features a little. He looks down between them, and lowers his hands to finds Fabian's to hold onto in their laps. ]
[ The peck does help with the reboot in the sense that Fabian looks a whole lot less freaked out.
But he doesn't smile after it either. His gaze is more thoughtful than that. And a little bit worried too, though he isn't avoiding Gorgug's gaze. Like he wants to be honest with him about this, especially after what they did at the party, after the talk they've had just now. ]
That is exactly what I'm worried about.
[ .. is he projecting? He isn't sure. Technically he doesn't know how Riz feels about this, after all. But Fabian does know that if Riz and Gorgug had started dating in this place.. He himself would likely feel a little weird about it.
Especially because of what Gorgug is saying. It's been a hard time for all of them. This place is a hard time for all of them. Someone feeling left out would only make it worse. ]
Do you think we could tell him without him feeling bad..? [ For how much Fabian often takes the lead, it seems like he's leaving this guess in Gorgug's hands.
Maybe because Gorgug actually has experience with the entire dating thing in the first place, unlike Fabian. Not that all the communication with Zelda always went super well, but-- you know. It's still more experience. ]
[ This is a lot more thinking than thought he was coming into Fabian's room to do, but he at least takes it seriously. Or tries to--the thing is, he doesn't really have an answer or a solution that he knows is going to work for this problem. If it's even a problem to begin with, and they're not trying to prepare to put out a fire that won't even exist.
But it's about Riz, so they both care. Gorgug looks up at Fabian's ceiling, quiet as he contemplates--less of a furrowed brow for once, and only slightly. ]
Well... how about we take it slowly...? We're still figuring out what this is, or...I don't know what dating in Etraya is going to be like. [ Admittedly. That's the thing. What are they going to do to date? ] So- we'll think about what we want to do and how we want to spend time with each other, and make room for that and for Riz, too. And everyone else.
[ Right? But now Gorgug's really stuck on what he just said, and now he's closer to making his usual face... ]
[ At first Fabian nods while Gorgug speaks. It does sound good to him - really, they should at least seem confident about what they have figured out between the two of them before they can properly tell Riz about it, right? - and he figures it's something they would have done by default, anyway. He can't imagine Gorgug ignoring Riz, and it's not like Fabian has any intention of ditching his friend either.
But then that question follows, and Fabian looks at Gorgug with his one eye in a way that seems to indicate he hadn't really thought this through that far yet.
(Let's be real - these boys aren't doing that much thinking in the first place.) ]
Well-- [ There's a slight pause, but it's not too long before he's already settled on: ] That would be nice.
[ He's always wanted that, after all. Dates always seemed like an important part to his ideal dream relationship. And the thought of a date with Gorgug.. It's kind of nice.
Especially when he thinks of the sweetness they're already sharing between the two of them as they're sitting on his bed here. ]
If we can make it work somehow, despite this place being.. [ His voice trails off, and in a tone of you-know-what-I-mean he adds: ] .. this place.
[ Aka: impossible to work with at times. Who says it isn't doing to do something dumb to them mid-date? ]
[ It's not that out there, at least: going on dates. Even in Etraya, despite the uncertainty presented in the idea to Fabian, but mainly because Gorgug's never considered it before. He was even talking to Rosie about how she should date and be happy, and he'd think the same for any other of his friends.
...just, he's never thought about what they might do. But there's a few cafés around run by the companion bots, so maybe it won't be that weird. It's not like they're in a completely empty city save the people being brought into it by mysterious means. ]
We can. [ It might be a bold statement, despite not being put forward in a bold way. Still: ] If you want to, we will. We'll think of stuff we can do, and-- if we just wanna hang out, we can do that too.
[ There is a very important matter, after all. ] You didn't even get to use the dance rooms yet.
[ Right? Maybe Fabian saw them (or one of them), but, that's a pretty big deal! Dancing is Fabian's thing! ]
[ There's something kind of nice about how easy this seems to be. Or, rather-- how easy Gorgug is making this. With the kind of examples Fabian has had in his life, he always imagined the whole romance thing to be something incredibly complicated. Something where you'd keep having to make up over the top things to do together, like that's the only way you could possibly have a relationship.
He never thought it could be this easy until Gorgug laid it out like this. Just.. hanging out together. That easy.
It's nice. ]
You'd want to watch me dance? [ After all, Gorgug is kind of putting it in the context of a date.. There's a faint blush on Fabian's cheeks as he asks that because of that thought.
I-Is that proper date material? Gorgug said he doesn't like dancing, but if it's a date, he'd have to come along to the dance studio.. So is that what he'd want instead? ]
Sure. It's fun watching you dance. It's-- relaxing.
[ There's not even a grand pause in finding that word. It comes easily, and it's true: while Fabian's moves can be dramatic and involve many flips, there's something fun and soothing in watching Fabian. You know he's having a good time, and you get to have a good time just chilling and watching him. ]
I can bring over some books, too, or some smaller projects. But I like the idea of us hanging out that way... [ He looks up briefly, conceding: ] Anyone can hang out like that, but... it was fun when me and Zelda did that. Schoolwork together. Even if we invite Riz sometimes too, we can have days where it's the two of us.
[ Would it be interesting to Fabian? Is it too casual sounding? Gorgug looks at Fabian, watching him with interest. They can have nice days out, but Gorgug likes the relaxed ones, too. And Fabian's dance studio will be more fun for the other guy than when he comes over to Gorgug's lab and there's nothing to do, right?
...even if Gorgug has nothing to do, he can make that sacrifice for a few hours. Fabian's done it plenty. ]
[ It doesn't seem difficult for Fabian to agree with the idea. Something about it does make him just a touch shy - or maybe just still flustered, judging by the look on his face as he answers.
Maybe it's just sweet. Kind of touching. Even if Fabian hung out at Gorgug's lab plenty of times, this feels different to him. It feels natural to Fabian to give that effort to others, but he doesn't necessarily expect it in return. Hence - this reaction. ]
I like that too. Just spending time together. [ For as over the top as Fabian can be, that sort of thing doesn't have to be too wild.
Just this-- that's enough for him, too. ]
And I'm not really used to people coming out to see me dance like that either. Not-- Not outside of class, I mean. [ He looks over at Gorgug, smiling a little. ] It's nice.
Your dancing is nice. [ No, not just that: ] You're nice.
[ Is he just getting sappy and silly now because he can? You bet'cha. It's just nice, the two of them talking, especially when he got worried a little before that Fabian was going to go through some regret of them having sex in the first place. And he's happy too: that Fabian's happy after the time he's been having lately, and Gorgug can admit to being glad for himself.
That this night has gone so well, and he can feel it, experience it: that he no longer feels so disconnected from his own emotions. It might come back at times, but that's alright.
[ It's sappy and silly. But maybe sappy and silly is just what two bros need, especially when they've been going through a rough while. There's something nice about not having to worry about anything for a few moments. About just sitting here close to each other, and that being the only thing that matters in the moment. ]
So.. [ Fabian starts, slowly, the smile still lingering on his lips. ]
If you can handle a not yet improved bed for tonight, it's about time we make use of this occasion, right? [ He reaches out, and considering Gorgug already came here in his pajamas, there's no need to wait or anything. Fabian can just latch onto the other's wrist and start tugging him down, pulling back the blankets on the bed so they can settle in under them. ] I don't know about you, but someone really tired me out earlier.
[ It's a definite silly tease, because Fabian is still smiling as he says it. The warmth of his smile easily carries into his tone, the way it always seems to do for Fabian. ]
[ Fabian pulls, so Gorgug follows, letting himself drop carefully (even if he doesn't want to, but he should, this is Fabian's bed and not his) down onto the mattress with-- his potentially new boyfriend? Potentially. Apparently. Likely. And that's a new state of things that's buzzing around inside him, as he comes to lay beside Fabian, helping the blankets be pulled across them as Fabian brings them over first.
Not so long ago, he had been afraid to make the first move to touch Fabian in bed, even in a non-suggestive, non-romantic sense. But his fingers search and find Fabian's hand, threading them together. ]
I can tire you out more than that. [ It would be sexy... and it's meant sexily, or just a sort of Gorgug honesty. He moves his face close to Fabian's, his head tipping upwards to make sure he doesn't catch the other on his tusks when he plants a kiss on Fabian's cheek. ] You're gonna need to raise your stamina.
[ Big talk for Gorgug right now... but his own expression is comfortable on the pillow, and he's not trying any funny business. ]
[ There's a little sound coming from Fabian when Gorgug says that.
It's kind of a surprised sound, but also definitely flustered. Like Fabian got caught that much off guard by what Gorgug suddenly so boldly said that his brain needs a moment to try and deal with this. It doesn't help that his mind is already definitely visualizing a thing or two at Gorgug's words, and the thought of that is certainly sexy.
Fabian likes it when Gorgug gets all confident, after all. It may not always come naturally to Gorgug, but that makes the moments when it does all the more hotter. He wants to see Gorgug with this kind of confidence.
Feeling his cheeks burn, Fabian momentarily moves his head forward a little, shoving it against Gorgug's shoulder in an attempt to hide the way his cheeks are darkening with a blush. ]
You didn't warn me that you were going to be like this.
[ It doesn't sound like a complaint, though. Nor a rejection of the idea. There's no denying that there's something pretty eager in Fabian's tone, no matter how flustered it sounds at the same time.
[ Oh? Gorgug watches Fabian with interest, more so when he makes that comment--surprised. He can tell it isn't a real complaint, leaving the small smile playing on his face. ]
Like what?
[ Tell him, Fabian. You've gotta tell a bro(friend) what he's being like. He has to know these things clearly, see.
Even if you might be able to feel Gorgug watching you fondly, despite your attempts to hide your face. Gorgug does like this view too, though--Fabian almost sulking, or shying away, both in a positive sense.
He feels like he's going to start seeing Fabian in a new light, now. He has to pay attention, and learn. ]
A protest that isn't fully a protest, but that has to sound like one because Fabian can't just accept that Gorgug can reduce him to a flustered mess this easily. That isn't right. It can't happen. He-- He's Fabian Aramais Seacaster, after all!
And yet here he is, still hiding his face against his friend while mumbling that word back at him. How dare you be hot, Gorgug? ]
Where have you been hiding all of this all these years? I mean-- We've seen each other naked before! So many times!
[ Never mind the fact that Gorgug would have zero reason to act sexy in the showers after a game of Bloodrush.
It's nice, being called hot by Fabian. It's not that Gorgug has serious hang-ups about his appearance (he's dated! and sure, he's not the usual orc material, but he doesn't do too bad), but it's nice to hear it--nice to hear again, after Fabian already as much, but with a lot more hormones at play.
But what he continues it with is curious to Gorgug--puzzling. Because was he hiding his hotness all these years? Gorgug watches Fabian with interest, even if he isn't looking at him back, and this position is nice enough with them both tucked closely together. ]
I've been this hot all this time. [ Said...so matter-of-factly... ] You just didn't notice. You didn't look. You weren't interested.
[ And isn't it true? Gorgug never thought Fabian would be interested in him, and it never aligned for them -- didn't seem to, until that spar. Like something clocked for them, something sexual, and it opened up a possibility.
But was it just that? With Fabian coming to Gorgug tonight, kissing him as he did-- even Gorgug's wondering, thinking about it. ]
[ He groans. Still not moving back, which means he's just directly groaning against Gorgug now, mind you. It's like Fabian simply refuses to accept the possibility that maybe Gorgug was hot all along and it was just Fabian's fault for not noticing.
That couldn't possibly be it, right? After all, that would mean he could have been kissing Gorgug on the first day of school instead of punching him...
....
He pulls back a little. Just enough so they can actually look at each other, especially as Fabian asks this. ]
Did you always think I was hot?
[ It's like two loading screens trying to figure all of this out.. ]
[ The face that Fabian finds is one of surprise, especially following that question. A blank sort of surprise, confused, if not on the scale that Gorgug's puzzled state usually weigh on. But that confusion does come through more in his voice, when: ]
--Yeah? But you're the kind of guy who dresses himself to tell everyone he's hot. [ And, obviously! ] I have eyes. I can see that you're hot.
[ Isn't it obvious? He doesn't really need to look over Fabian and confirm in this second, is he sure Fabian's hot? Because it's just-- kinda always been the case. Two eyes or one eye. Mental breakdown and mental revitalisation (okay, well, getting his eye torn out or having the worst (second worst?) day of his life wasn't hot, but), Fabian Seacaster has always had-- the looks.
But he's watching Fabian now, curious. ]
Do you feel bad you never noticed?
[ He means about Gorgug being this hot, but he doesn't care to be specific. He's more interested in what Fabian might be thinking about with this knowledge. ]
Now he can't even revel in Gorgug's answer to his question. Now he can't even brag about the fact that he is of course hot as hell. No, Fabian has been put into a Saw trap by Gorgug, who likely doesn't even have any idea of what sort of situation he's putting the poor half-elf in.
Even though Fabian feels himself rapidly getting nervous when he hears that question. Not even because he thinks Gorgug will get mad, it's just-- Something about it makes him feel guilty. Bad. There's something about the fact that he only noticed the more attractive sides of Gorgug this late that feels really, really bad. ]
Uh..
[ .. hence why he can't even answer quickly. Fabian is trying to make sure he absolutely does not have to look at Gorgug right now. He can't. He won't. ]
I-- I mean. It's just-- you know?
[ You know, Gorgug?
You know, right. He doesn't have to say any more than this, right?? Please?? ]
[ You know what Fabian needs a lot of? Time. Usually it's time to speak, and while there's a lack of speaking coherently right now, that doesn't dismiss the fact that Fabian needs space to get his words out. Talking is Fabian's thing. So Gorgug continues to watch Fabian the same as he had been before and when he asked the question, nodding his head a little, and repeating-- ]
You know.
[ He's trying to encourage him to continue! To get his answer out! You can do it, Fabian. You can get your words out!
[ This is absolutely NOT helping. Fabian feels like he's dying. It feels like he can't say it, like he might choke on the words if he tries to force them out, but there's no other option, apparently. Gorgug is never going to pick up on what he's putting down unless he actually says it.
Even though dragging the words out of himself feels like torture. Fabian makes sure to still not look at Gorgug, because he's pretty sure he will instinctively shut up the moment he does.
If there's anything Fabian isn't good at, it's admitting it when he's wrong.. ]
Of-- Of course.. I feel bad. [ He says, slowly.
But he is saying it! Just with way more effort necessary than any normal person would need. ]
If I had realized it sooner, then maybe we could've been like this sooner too. Just imagine how much different things could have been this entire time.
Gorgug doesn't stop looking at Fabian, even though he's not looking at him back. Because he's interested, he is curious: about what Fabian's thinking, what he's feeling. And this doesn't seem like (to him) one of those times where looking away will help. It's about-- them? Him?
And he's not afraid of the answer. Really, he wonders if it wouldn't have taken a particular moment like they had with the spar for Fabian to ever look at him that way. A thought and ponder that's for a future Gorgug to have, if he ever does--or would it take buying a building practically dedicated to Fabian for him to look at him twice?
It's a similar line of thinking that Gorgug comes to, or brushes against when Fabian does finally: Just imagine how much different things could have been. Fabian has regrets; he feels bad now. But none of that resonates with Gorgug--he doesn't feel sad. Would it have been fun to kiss Fabian and have sex with him sooner? Sure, but... ]
We were still friends. We've still been a team. [ His eyes continue to on Fabian, but gentle in their view on him. He's comfortable, content, both in bed with him and with this conversation. With their lot in life. ] And we have now--I'm okay with that. Being here, right now, with you.
We can do what we want. I don't think... we've missed a thing.
[ This is just what their life is. This is what they have. ]
[ If it wasn't for everything that had happened over the past few months, Fabian might have felt a little bit envious about how Gorgug can just say that. And so easily too. It's like the entire sentiment just comes naturally to the other, and that's a wild thought to Fabian. He doesn't think he could ever think about stuff like this so easily.
It's not even a bad thing, really. He'd find it admirable. Sometimes Fabian gets tired of his own overthinking when it comes to certain things - and the thought of just being okay with things as long as they're good in the moment sounds kind of nice.
(Especially to a guy who has constantly been striving to get better, to a point where satisfaction in the moment is hard.)
But Fabian knows things aren't that simple with Gorgug. He knows the other has his own worries, his own struggles. It's just that this one maybe happens to be a little easier to Gorgug than it is to Fabian.
Fabian is quiet for a moment.
But he doesn't look away, nor try to hide. Not even when he speaks up again. He wants to look at Gorgug when he says this, wants to see what the other looks like when he answers. ]
It's a meaningful question. After the past few months, they've both been searching for their own kinds of happiness, and Gorgug himself has been adopting the fake it 'til you make it lifestyle for the past month or so. After the racing mission made it a little easier to focus, and he's been working on being more social with that nudge that he was struggling to find over his hump.
None of that should be a thought right now, in most scenarios. But Gorgug thinks that when Fabian asks that question, his overall mood is being questioned. Or maybe it's about this moment between them, what they've decided on.
Is he happy? ...it's not too difficult of a question, though he does feel Fabian's gaze on him, makes the small smile that presses against his lips feel-- just a tad shy.
But even so. ]
I'm happy. [ He's looking right back at Fabian, a little giddy. Happy enough to lay with his own answer, but asking back after a moment: ] Are you?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
...that Gorgug doesn't read, so it means nothing to Gorgug. Except he's thinking about what Fabian's saying, as he does. Because he just said he wouldn't get jealous, but with Fabian saying there's nothing to get jealous of... is that true? Could he get jealous?
Maybe. But he also isn't sure if it's worth saying that, so. It's a distracting thought for a moment. ]
I can sleep with other people too, then?
[ There isn't a good reason that he asks it. Truthfully, it's just because Fabian's being so flustered and panicking over it that Gorgug asks something that....just comes first to his head. Fabian is saying a thing, so he is going to ask a question based on that thing.
2+2=4, here. ]
no subject
He quickly banishes the thought from his head, considering it's giving him a really weird feeling down in his stomach that he doesn't want to think about enough to find out what it is. ]
W-Well, I mean.. [ Look at Fabian go. He looks so uncertain. Not because he wants to be unfair about this, though - it's more just that he's still flustered. He needs a moment to breathe, to calm down.
Then he can answer Gorgug properly. ]
Of course. Just as friends. I wouldn't find it weird if you slept with Fig the way I do with the Ball. [ See, that feels like a more proper analogy. Bad Kid sleeping. Sleeping with your bestie. T-That's fine, right? Fabian doesn't feel weird about that thought, unlike where his flustered mine went only a moment ago. ]
no subject
...
His mouth opens, and then closes, his brain doing the calculations that are obviously already there. Fabian said he's the first guy he's thought about sexually, and he's willing to believe that, so- no. Fabian and Riz haven't secretly been fucking this entire time. ]
Okay. Yeah. That's what I mean. I don't really sleep with anyone except you and Riz anyway...
[ So, it's not as much of a factor for him, and his sleeping sessions with Riz don't come up as often as they do for Fabian and Riz, so.
...but his brain is still questioning that fluster that Fabian got in, though Gorgug isn't sure how to address it. So what he does, as if it might help anything, is leans in to give Fabian a quick peck on the lips.
Reboot? Reboot. ]
I don't think anything is going on between you and Riz. [ Is he reassuring Fabian? May...be... ] But we should... depending on what we wanna do, we have to remember he's a part of our life here, too. I don't want him to feel lonely.
[ And saying that, it softens Gorgug's features a little. He looks down between them, and lowers his hands to finds Fabian's to hold onto in their laps. ]
It's been a hard time for all of us.
no subject
But he doesn't smile after it either. His gaze is more thoughtful than that. And a little bit worried too, though he isn't avoiding Gorgug's gaze. Like he wants to be honest with him about this, especially after what they did at the party, after the talk they've had just now. ]
That is exactly what I'm worried about.
[ .. is he projecting? He isn't sure. Technically he doesn't know how Riz feels about this, after all. But Fabian does know that if Riz and Gorgug had started dating in this place.. He himself would likely feel a little weird about it.
Especially because of what Gorgug is saying. It's been a hard time for all of them. This place is a hard time for all of them. Someone feeling left out would only make it worse. ]
Do you think we could tell him without him feeling bad..? [ For how much Fabian often takes the lead, it seems like he's leaving this guess in Gorgug's hands.
Maybe because Gorgug actually has experience with the entire dating thing in the first place, unlike Fabian. Not that all the communication with Zelda always went super well, but-- you know. It's still more experience. ]
no subject
But it's about Riz, so they both care. Gorgug looks up at Fabian's ceiling, quiet as he contemplates--less of a furrowed brow for once, and only slightly. ]
Well... how about we take it slowly...? We're still figuring out what this is, or...I don't know what dating in Etraya is going to be like. [ Admittedly. That's the thing. What are they going to do to date? ] So- we'll think about what we want to do and how we want to spend time with each other, and make room for that and for Riz, too. And everyone else.
[ Right? But now Gorgug's really stuck on what he just said, and now he's closer to making his usual face... ]
...do you wanna go on dates here...?
[ Truly. What is dating in Etraya. ]
no subject
But then that question follows, and Fabian looks at Gorgug with his one eye in a way that seems to indicate he hadn't really thought this through that far yet.
(Let's be real - these boys aren't doing that much thinking in the first place.) ]
Well-- [ There's a slight pause, but it's not too long before he's already settled on: ] That would be nice.
[ He's always wanted that, after all. Dates always seemed like an important part to his ideal dream relationship. And the thought of a date with Gorgug.. It's kind of nice.
Especially when he thinks of the sweetness they're already sharing between the two of them as they're sitting on his bed here. ]
If we can make it work somehow, despite this place being.. [ His voice trails off, and in a tone of you-know-what-I-mean he adds: ] .. this place.
[ Aka: impossible to work with at times. Who says it isn't doing to do something dumb to them mid-date? ]
no subject
...just, he's never thought about what they might do. But there's a few cafés around run by the companion bots, so maybe it won't be that weird. It's not like they're in a completely empty city save the people being brought into it by mysterious means. ]
We can. [ It might be a bold statement, despite not being put forward in a bold way. Still: ] If you want to, we will. We'll think of stuff we can do, and-- if we just wanna hang out, we can do that too.
[ There is a very important matter, after all. ] You didn't even get to use the dance rooms yet.
[ Right? Maybe Fabian saw them (or one of them), but, that's a pretty big deal! Dancing is Fabian's thing! ]
no subject
He never thought it could be this easy until Gorgug laid it out like this. Just.. hanging out together. That easy.
It's nice. ]
You'd want to watch me dance? [ After all, Gorgug is kind of putting it in the context of a date.. There's a faint blush on Fabian's cheeks as he asks that because of that thought.
I-Is that proper date material? Gorgug said he doesn't like dancing, but if it's a date, he'd have to come along to the dance studio.. So is that what he'd want instead? ]
no subject
Sure. It's fun watching you dance. It's-- relaxing.
[ There's not even a grand pause in finding that word. It comes easily, and it's true: while Fabian's moves can be dramatic and involve many flips, there's something fun and soothing in watching Fabian. You know he's having a good time, and you get to have a good time just chilling and watching him. ]
I can bring over some books, too, or some smaller projects. But I like the idea of us hanging out that way... [ He looks up briefly, conceding: ] Anyone can hang out like that, but... it was fun when me and Zelda did that. Schoolwork together. Even if we invite Riz sometimes too, we can have days where it's the two of us.
[ Would it be interesting to Fabian? Is it too casual sounding? Gorgug looks at Fabian, watching him with interest. They can have nice days out, but Gorgug likes the relaxed ones, too. And Fabian's dance studio will be more fun for the other guy than when he comes over to Gorgug's lab and there's nothing to do, right?
...even if Gorgug has nothing to do, he can make that sacrifice for a few hours. Fabian's done it plenty. ]
no subject
[ It doesn't seem difficult for Fabian to agree with the idea. Something about it does make him just a touch shy - or maybe just still flustered, judging by the look on his face as he answers.
Maybe it's just sweet. Kind of touching. Even if Fabian hung out at Gorgug's lab plenty of times, this feels different to him. It feels natural to Fabian to give that effort to others, but he doesn't necessarily expect it in return. Hence - this reaction. ]
I like that too. Just spending time together. [ For as over the top as Fabian can be, that sort of thing doesn't have to be too wild.
Just this-- that's enough for him, too. ]
And I'm not really used to people coming out to see me dance like that either. Not-- Not outside of class, I mean. [ He looks over at Gorgug, smiling a little. ] It's nice.
no subject
Your dancing is nice. [ No, not just that: ] You're nice.
[ Is he just getting sappy and silly now because he can? You bet'cha. It's just nice, the two of them talking, especially when he got worried a little before that Fabian was going to go through some regret of them having sex in the first place. And he's happy too: that Fabian's happy after the time he's been having lately, and Gorgug can admit to being glad for himself.
That this night has gone so well, and he can feel it, experience it: that he no longer feels so disconnected from his own emotions. It might come back at times, but that's alright.
Right now, this feeling--it's good. ]
no subject
So.. [ Fabian starts, slowly, the smile still lingering on his lips. ]
If you can handle a not yet improved bed for tonight, it's about time we make use of this occasion, right? [ He reaches out, and considering Gorgug already came here in his pajamas, there's no need to wait or anything. Fabian can just latch onto the other's wrist and start tugging him down, pulling back the blankets on the bed so they can settle in under them. ] I don't know about you, but someone really tired me out earlier.
[ It's a definite silly tease, because Fabian is still smiling as he says it. The warmth of his smile easily carries into his tone, the way it always seems to do for Fabian. ]
no subject
Not so long ago, he had been afraid to make the first move to touch Fabian in bed, even in a non-suggestive, non-romantic sense. But his fingers search and find Fabian's hand, threading them together. ]
I can tire you out more than that. [ It would be sexy... and it's meant sexily, or just a sort of Gorgug honesty. He moves his face close to Fabian's, his head tipping upwards to make sure he doesn't catch the other on his tusks when he plants a kiss on Fabian's cheek. ] You're gonna need to raise your stamina.
[ Big talk for Gorgug right now... but his own expression is comfortable on the pillow, and he's not trying any funny business. ]
no subject
It's kind of a surprised sound, but also definitely flustered. Like Fabian got caught that much off guard by what Gorgug suddenly so boldly said that his brain needs a moment to try and deal with this. It doesn't help that his mind is already definitely visualizing a thing or two at Gorgug's words, and the thought of that is certainly sexy.
Fabian likes it when Gorgug gets all confident, after all. It may not always come naturally to Gorgug, but that makes the moments when it does all the more hotter. He wants to see Gorgug with this kind of confidence.
Feeling his cheeks burn, Fabian momentarily moves his head forward a little, shoving it against Gorgug's shoulder in an attempt to hide the way his cheeks are darkening with a blush. ]
You didn't warn me that you were going to be like this.
[ It doesn't sound like a complaint, though. Nor a rejection of the idea. There's no denying that there's something pretty eager in Fabian's tone, no matter how flustered it sounds at the same time.
He likes the idea. ]
no subject
Like what?
[ Tell him, Fabian. You've gotta tell a bro(friend) what he's being like. He has to know these things clearly, see.
Even if you might be able to feel Gorgug watching you fondly, despite your attempts to hide your face. Gorgug does like this view too, though--Fabian almost sulking, or shying away, both in a positive sense.
He feels like he's going to start seeing Fabian in a new light, now. He has to pay attention, and learn. ]
no subject
A protest that isn't fully a protest, but that has to sound like one because Fabian can't just accept that Gorgug can reduce him to a flustered mess this easily. That isn't right. It can't happen. He-- He's Fabian Aramais Seacaster, after all!
And yet here he is, still hiding his face against his friend while mumbling that word back at him. How dare you be hot, Gorgug? ]
Where have you been hiding all of this all these years? I mean-- We've seen each other naked before! So many times!
[ Never mind the fact that Gorgug would have zero reason to act sexy in the showers after a game of Bloodrush.
Especially with Fabian's towel antics. ]
no subject
It's nice, being called hot by Fabian. It's not that Gorgug has serious hang-ups about his appearance (he's dated! and sure, he's not the usual orc material, but he doesn't do too bad), but it's nice to hear it--nice to hear again, after Fabian already as much, but with a lot more hormones at play.
But what he continues it with is curious to Gorgug--puzzling. Because was he hiding his hotness all these years? Gorgug watches Fabian with interest, even if he isn't looking at him back, and this position is nice enough with them both tucked closely together. ]
I've been this hot all this time. [ Said...so matter-of-factly... ] You just didn't notice. You didn't look. You weren't interested.
[ And isn't it true? Gorgug never thought Fabian would be interested in him, and it never aligned for them -- didn't seem to, until that spar. Like something clocked for them, something sexual, and it opened up a possibility.
But was it just that? With Fabian coming to Gorgug tonight, kissing him as he did-- even Gorgug's wondering, thinking about it. ]
no subject
That couldn't possibly be it, right? After all, that would mean he could have been kissing Gorgug on the first day of school instead of punching him...
....
He pulls back a little. Just enough so they can actually look at each other, especially as Fabian asks this. ]
Did you always think I was hot?
[ It's like two loading screens trying to figure all of this out.. ]
no subject
--Yeah? But you're the kind of guy who dresses himself to tell everyone he's hot. [ And, obviously! ] I have eyes. I can see that you're hot.
[ Isn't it obvious? He doesn't really need to look over Fabian and confirm in this second, is he sure Fabian's hot? Because it's just-- kinda always been the case. Two eyes or one eye. Mental breakdown and mental revitalisation (okay, well, getting his eye torn out or having the worst (second worst?) day of his life wasn't hot, but), Fabian Seacaster has always had-- the looks.
But he's watching Fabian now, curious. ]
Do you feel bad you never noticed?
[ He means about Gorgug being this hot, but he doesn't care to be specific. He's more interested in what Fabian might be thinking about with this knowledge. ]
no subject
Now he can't even revel in Gorgug's answer to his question. Now he can't even brag about the fact that he is of course hot as hell. No, Fabian has been put into a Saw trap by Gorgug, who likely doesn't even have any idea of what sort of situation he's putting the poor half-elf in.
Even though Fabian feels himself rapidly getting nervous when he hears that question. Not even because he thinks Gorgug will get mad, it's just-- Something about it makes him feel guilty. Bad. There's something about the fact that he only noticed the more attractive sides of Gorgug this late that feels really, really bad. ]
Uh..
[ .. hence why he can't even answer quickly. Fabian is trying to make sure he absolutely does not have to look at Gorgug right now. He can't. He won't. ]
I-- I mean. It's just-- you know?
[ You know, Gorgug?
You know, right. He doesn't have to say any more than this, right?? Please?? ]
no subject
You know.
[ He's trying to encourage him to continue! To get his answer out! You can do it, Fabian. You can get your words out!
(And it's not even intentional, truly....) ]
no subject
Even though dragging the words out of himself feels like torture. Fabian makes sure to still not look at Gorgug, because he's pretty sure he will instinctively shut up the moment he does.
If there's anything Fabian isn't good at, it's admitting it when he's wrong.. ]
Of-- Of course.. I feel bad. [ He says, slowly.
But he is saying it! Just with way more effort necessary than any normal person would need. ]
If I had realized it sooner, then maybe we could've been like this sooner too. Just imagine how much different things could have been this entire time.
no subject
Gorgug doesn't stop looking at Fabian, even though he's not looking at him back. Because he's interested, he is curious: about what Fabian's thinking, what he's feeling. And this doesn't seem like (to him) one of those times where looking away will help. It's about-- them? Him?
And he's not afraid of the answer. Really, he wonders if it wouldn't have taken a particular moment like they had with the spar for Fabian to ever look at him that way. A thought and ponder that's for a future Gorgug to have, if he ever does--or would it take buying a building practically dedicated to Fabian for him to look at him twice?
It's a similar line of thinking that Gorgug comes to, or brushes against when Fabian does finally: Just imagine how much different things could have been. Fabian has regrets; he feels bad now. But none of that resonates with Gorgug--he doesn't feel sad. Would it have been fun to kiss Fabian and have sex with him sooner? Sure, but... ]
We were still friends. We've still been a team. [ His eyes continue to on Fabian, but gentle in their view on him. He's comfortable, content, both in bed with him and with this conversation. With their lot in life. ] And we have now--I'm okay with that. Being here, right now, with you.
We can do what we want. I don't think... we've missed a thing.
[ This is just what their life is. This is what they have. ]
no subject
It's not even a bad thing, really. He'd find it admirable. Sometimes Fabian gets tired of his own overthinking when it comes to certain things - and the thought of just being okay with things as long as they're good in the moment sounds kind of nice.
(Especially to a guy who has constantly been striving to get better, to a point where satisfaction in the moment is hard.)
But Fabian knows things aren't that simple with Gorgug. He knows the other has his own worries, his own struggles. It's just that this one maybe happens to be a little easier to Gorgug than it is to Fabian.
Fabian is quiet for a moment.
But he doesn't look away, nor try to hide. Not even when he speaks up again. He wants to look at Gorgug when he says this, wants to see what the other looks like when he answers. ]
You're happy right now?
no subject
It's a meaningful question. After the past few months, they've both been searching for their own kinds of happiness, and Gorgug himself has been adopting the fake it 'til you make it lifestyle for the past month or so. After the racing mission made it a little easier to focus, and he's been working on being more social with that nudge that he was struggling to find over his hump.
None of that should be a thought right now, in most scenarios. But Gorgug thinks that when Fabian asks that question, his overall mood is being questioned. Or maybe it's about this moment between them, what they've decided on.
Is he happy? ...it's not too difficult of a question, though he does feel Fabian's gaze on him, makes the small smile that presses against his lips feel-- just a tad shy.
But even so. ]
I'm happy. [ He's looking right back at Fabian, a little giddy. Happy enough to lay with his own answer, but asking back after a moment: ] Are you?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
we finally wrapped it... we did it.......